A New Year in Corporate Hell..Hopefully Not the Entire Year

Well, in less than a week my business will have been open 5 months. Unfortunately my business is not growing as fast as I was hoping. I wanted to be able to leave the imprisonment of my corporate job already but here I am still chained to this desk. Each and every day when I open my eyes dread overcomes me as I think of how my life has turned out and the daily torture of my existence. Driving in traffic 2 hours a day and sometimes more to get to and from a horrendously demeaning job which I detest, surrounded by despicable people working for a despicable company. Yes, I realize that this despicable company is how I am existing at this time but the humiliation and degradation is a hard pill to swallow for that paycheck. If it wasn't for the fact that I am able to spend a significant amount of time with my own thoughts I would probably have committed suicide by now.

I can't tell you what it is like to be extremely intelligent and capable and highly educated with 3 college degrees including a MBA, plus hold a real estate license and own my own business and still be asked on a weekly basis to do the most inane clerical tasks by the morons that have shockingly made it to hire positions then I. It is literally painful for me to get such requests. Not just because the people they come from could do the tasks in less time than it takes them to ask me to do them, but because it is such a gross waste of talent. Seriously, I do not mean this in a conceited way, but in a practical way. It is completely unproductive to use someone who is educated and extremely intelligent for tasks that could be completed by a monkey.

Disturbingly, the reason why I have not been promoted or even recognized in over a decade is for one reason and one reason alone. I refuse to kiss ass. Of course this coupled with the fact that I am a woman just ensures that I cannot receive a promotion. The discrimination at this hell hole is staggering, but the brazenness of it is repulsive. I went downstairs to get a cup of coffee earlier, and the cleaning girl was mopping the floor. Yes this company hires only whites for its "white collar" jobs; however, it has mostly foreigners doing the dirty work.

This young woman who is in her early 30's barely speaks English. She is obviously is from a foreign country even though she lives in Queens. She takes the bus to and from work every day to come here to clean our dirt. She scrubs toilets, floors, refrigerators, counters, pictures, banisters and everything else. It literally turns my stomach when I see this poor timid young lady enslaved by the white man in the year 2010. Of course you can argue that she is getting paid, but I would bet my life that what she is getting paid is merely a pittance. I have no doubt about it. Otherwise she would own a car and drive herself to work when it is 15 below zero out. How shameful to exploit undocumented people in this manner.

We have other "workers" that are not white that do the outside dirty work. They rake, mow and most egregious they wash the 100K cars of the company elites, the owners & VP's. These, mostly men, with one or two token women, even get their cars washed when it is raining out. Despicable. These men who make over half a million dollars a year get free gas. While the rest of us, who are paid a pittance and can barely afford to purchase gas must do so anyway.

How ruthlessly unfair, how challenging to swallow day after day after day. The so called management knows it has people by the balls. I was told at my performance review last year when I expressed my disappointment at once again not receiving a cost of living pay increase that I "should be happy to have a job". I have also been told time and time again that this hump of a company "wants to do more with less". I'd love to ask, how that is working out for you, you fucking scumbags.

I know I need to spend less time focused on my anger and more time focused promoting my biz, but when I am forced to deal with bullshit on a daily basis it distracts me from my main goal, MY BUSINESS. I know I must not allow it.....but I am finding that of particular difficulty.